08.26.08
The Wounded Healer
I was taught and it has been my own personal experience that one’s mission or ministry in life often stems from the source of one’s greatest trial, pain or suffering. Recently when I was watching a Youtube video of Donald Miller at Point Loma Nazarene College’s Writer Symposium by the Sea, a question towards the later part of the video addressed the area of pain, both in life and as an aspect of his writing. He references a calling to his being a wounded healer to others through his writing by sharing his experiences through empathy and the assurance that people are not only in their experience. Then I thought about the testimony I shared on the Lofter’s Life blog recently on the Teamloft website managed by my friend Bob East. Wasn’t that living the role of the “wounded healer“?
Many of us minister to others through our words, deeds, actions and writing because of the hurts and pains we have suffered and been through. It is the former alcoholic taking an active role in assisting those who are trying to escape the throes of alcoholism. It is like Donald Miller who created the Belmont Foundation to mentor to those who grew up without a father much like Donald. Whether it is greeting people because you realize how greeters helped you to come to Christ or creating a ministry to assist those families with Special Needs children because you had a special needs child yourself and could find no assistance.
Donald Miller references a quote by Bishop Desmond Tutu when he was asked who should be on a committee for reconcilliation in South Africa where he says “the people who should be on this committee are people who are victims. People whose lives have been ripped open and they have gained an education towards empathy. These people should be wounded healers” This quote is found in Antjie Krog’s book “Country of My Skull“
Attached is a transcript of the part of Donald’s interview I found so interesting. The video is about an hour and it’s towards the end.
“There’s a depth to… because my life has had some pain in it….there a broader range of colors with which to paint with. You have had joys and you have had lows, and you understand those things. And so if you want to talk about the human experience, there is a broad range …of tools you can use to do that.
” I think it enhances the work a little bit…. There have literally been times when I have wondered whether God gave me the experiences that I had in order that I could write them down and other people read them and not feel alone in their experiences. And, there have been times I have been pleased at that. That God would do that. And there are times when I’ve not wanted that. You know, I don’t want to deal with this….
” There’s a great line from Bishop Tutu in a book called “Country of my Skull” by Antjie Krog. She is talking about the formation of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission in South Africa. And Bishop Tutu was asked, ….., he is putting together a commission to try to… bring parties together, bring groups together, establish the healing or begin the healing process, Tutu was asked by the committee, what kind of person should be on this committee. And Tutu said, the people who should be on this committee are people who are victims. People whose lives have been ripped open and they have been gained an education towards empathy. These people should be wounded healers….
” I read that, and could only receive that as a dignified calling. That God doesn’t say “Look, this stuff happened to you so you’re just a loser or whatever. God says this happens to you. You have a choice here: You can both become a wounded healer and walk other people through it or you can let it take you and drown in it. And I clinging with everything I got to the wounded healer, because girls like it more…”
Donald as usual inserts his humorous style there at the end.
